the guys

Ok so lets break this down, there's 3 guys right now i constantly talk to...lets name them K, J, T.

So who first, let's start with K. Well K and I met over facebook because I randomly saw him on a friends page and poked him and from there it just became this cool friendship. He lives down south so he's far away but he's way cool and when he was up here we got to meet up one time. He's way chill, cute, a drinker (like me), and just all around a great guy. Now honestly, I think we'd totally be great together if we lived closer and could hang out constantly. Of the 3 guys, he and I just match. Body wise though, he's not all that great, skinny but still body doesn't matter to me that much anymore. So K and I just need to hang out again so I can kiss him already, which he has no objection about. Oh did I mention he's barely recently kissed a guy for the first time...and too bad it wasn't me.

Next guy, let's go with T. Well T also lives down south and this guy is the total good looking all american football jock. You would never guess for him to be into guys and he is still mainly into girls but he just fucks around with guys to get off. Now he's a way chill guy and we met through some online site for guys who are on the DL and lost touch but then we got reacquainted on facebook. I forget how, through a friend I think and I messaged him randomly. From there we chatted on facebook and what not...then I gave him my number and he gave me his. I text him randomly and most of the times he responds, we're just both chill and get bored. Anyways the other night when I was out with my friends, I texted him saying I hope he is drinking and he was. Later in the night he texts me to send him some nudes...I of course smiled as I read that and my friends tried to take my phone, which luckily they didn't. Anyways he sent me this shirtless pic and wow, he is way hot. So I sent him an ass pic and a shirtless pic as well. oh yeah, we haven't met yet.

Finally there's J. I've already mentioned him, he's the guy I went to hang out with. Well we're supposed to hang out again soon and I tried to today but he got busy so maybe next week, we'll see. He is way cool and cute and just accessible since he's only an hour away compared to the other two who are 5 hours away. Well J confuses me because sometimes he responds and sometimes he doesn't, I need to learn not to read too much into things and just kind of let this dating thing happen. Its hard because I'm eager for a relationship right now. I wonder if it will ever happen.

Oh just so you know, I'm not white. I bet that loses some readers because apparently everyone wants a white guy. Well I somehow make the exception on most peoples list, guess cute wins sometimes. Anyways, time for bed.

peaceOUT

40 questions...but a bitch ain't one hahha

1. Name? (screen name is fine)
i'd give ya my fake name but my friends know that name too since i use it when i go out...so discreetbiguy08 for now..

2. Are you a boy or girl?
Boy

3. How old are you?
just turned 25 but apparently look way young

4. Are you straight, gay, bi or unsure
Bi

5. Whats your favorite color?
blue

6. Whats your favorite food?
anything my mom makes

7. If you could choose only one type of food for the rest of you life, what type would it be? (ex. Italian, chinese, french, etc.)
korean possibly...its just soooo goood

8. How tall are you?
5'8"

9. Hair color?
dark brown/black

10. Whats your favorite movie?
cruel intentions

11. Favorite book?
catcher in the rye

12. Favorite tv show?
friends

13. What are your hobbies?
volleyball, music, art, food

14. What is the #1 thing that grosses you out?
things that smell bad...i hate it

15. Are you a virgin?
yes...lol..who am i kidding

16. If no, how far have you gone? (list both with boys and girls)
all the way with both

17. Are you athletic? What sports?
was in better shape but work got in the way of working out...will get back in shape though i'm not out of shape right now

18. For guys: How big are you? (you know what I mean... lol) Are you cut or uncut?
6-6.5cut

19. For girls: Whats your bra size?

20. Are you happy with your size?
wish it were bigger, but i've seen guys smaller and thinner than me so i know i'm not bad lol

21. Do you like, tolerate or get disgusted when you see an attractive person of the opposite sex?
like

22. What do you want to do with your life?
live it as much as i can

23. Do you masturbate? how many times a day?
usually every night before bed...

24. Do you have a "special" toy? (again you all know what I mean... lol)
no, someone send me one lol

25. Have you ever broken a bone or had another serious injury or sickness? Explain.
eh..tonsilitis real bad...i had to get a rocephin shot if anyone knows how that goes...yeah PAIN

26. What do you think is your most attractive feature?
i have no idea, i don't think i'm attractive but apparently i'm cute..

27. What do you think is your least attractive feature?
jawline...i want a better one

28. If there is one thing in your life you could change, what would that be?
nada, i love my life

29. Are you in a relationship? explain a little (boy, girl, short term, long term, etc)
not at all...*sigh

30. When was the last time you got some sexual action? (of any type)
lol i just got a hj from some guy

31. Mac or PC?
PC but switching over soon

32. Iphone, Blackberry, other PDA, or regular cell phone?
iPhone

33. Do you have any pets? Which ones?
dogs at home, yoshi and cali

34. For gay and bi guys: Are you a top or bottom?
both, kinda liking bottom now though

35. Whats the one thing in your life you are most proud of?
my job since i worked hard to get to where i'm at

36. Where is the weirdest place you masturbated or had sex?
in a kitchen during a party and people were walking in and out of that kitchen..WOW

37. Most number of times you came in a day?
can't remember i think like 6...started to hurt after awhile

38. What are you most afraid of?
dying alone

39. Favorite porn star?
eh none really, the corbin fisher guys are all pretty hot though

40. Do you have a blog? What is it?
umm this thing i'm writing on right now

..finishing last post up

...so work has been good the past 2 days which is much needed due to what happened 3 days ago. i would go into detail but you know, its all private stuff...lets just say it was hectic and i'm hoping it all blows over...

In other news, the boy I met and I haven't really been texting, mainly me asking him how he's doing. Told him I'm up for a movie this weekend if he's free but its up to him. So i'm not gonna text him anymore and let him make up his mind. The more I think about it, the more I realize it won't work out, even just friends...because I can't be friends with a guy I'm attracted, can you? I mean the one or two few gay guy friends I have I am not even attracted to at all. Not to say one of them isn't good looking, but he's just not my type. Unfortunately when it comes to guys, I really am only attracted to white guys, is this weird?

So I was on facebook and saw the updates of the guy I "dated" last, he was my rebound and man I keep thinking WTF was I thinking. He doesn't look good, he's not my type, and he's WEIRD. No more lowering standards, especially after realizing I can get a hot guy and pretty girl...plus...I get cute a lot.

Well about posting pics...I so would but see I have this tattoo on my body and no one in the world would have it so obviously it'd be traced back to me...plus I have a birth mark on my body too...so kinda hard to be discreet. But maybe if I get to know you better *cough* Secrets of an All American *cough*, I may send you a pic. Or at least a body pic you know haha. Well I got tons of stuff to take care of and hopefully I can get my stuff done today.

PeaceOUT

sex and sappy

Started the morning with the football player from New Zealand stopping by for some fun. Its fun and God knows I needed to get laid, but its nothing more than meaningless sex. Oh well, I'm not complaining because one thing is its good sex and second thing is he's got a nice body, masculine and football build. I'm just glad its good sex because bad sex is just a waste of time, don't you think?

So work was very stressful and I was very irritated today. I swear the demographics at this one particular place I have to work at is way below average. Honestly, its annoying because these people are where our tax dollars are going to and lots of my pay is taken away by taxes. Honestly, don't people generally want better for themself?

...so i'll have to finish this post later, i totally fell asleep doing this and now its time for work...

PeaceOUT

back from a "date"

so i drove about an hour away to meet up with some kid i met online and have been texting with and I'm glad I decided to drive out there. He is way chill, awesome, and cute. So we just hung out, he showed me around, we talked and got to know each other. He is dorky but in a good way and I think. Now he isn't hot like fit and all that but I take cute over hot any day. Dude he is way adorable and makes you just want to hug him. So anyways, he ends the night saying he just wants to be friends, gay buds with some fun here and there. He tells me midway through the night that he was sorta seeing someone else which is fine by me. Now at the end...he hugs me as he is about to get out of the car but then we end up kissing..."shouldn't have done that" he says and he feels guilty. I feel bad because as much as I wanted to kiss him, I didn't push it knowing he was seeing someone, but it just kind of happened anyways. All in all, it was a great time hanging out with him and I hope we get to hang out again even just as friends. I don't really have any gay buds and I think I need some, hanging with girls all the time is quite annoying. Speaking of girls, I'm hanging with one of my best friends tonight and dude, I had a trippy ass dream that she leaned in and made out with me when she was drunk...here's the weird part...I'm not sure if it was just a dream or not, I CAN'T REMEMBER if this actually happened. CRAP! I have thought about dating her at one or two points but no can do, like I said, right now I want a bf to see how that goes. Anyways, shes on her way and I need to eat something coz i'm HUNGARY (yes i spelled it like the country on purpose!)

PeaceOut

busy busy busy

So I'm a bit sick as I do this post and naturally I'm loading up on the necessary meds to kick this shiz's ass (you should have guessed by now what profession or at least what field I'm in). Well the other night I was up and was looking at my upcoming paycheck and I realized wow I'm averaging about 100 hours per 2 weeks of work, crazy huh? It sucks because almost half my paycheck goes to taxes, damn you people that I pay for you meds and you still drive nicer cars and wear nicer clothes than me. Don't get me wrong, I know some people need the help but there are plenty and I mean plenty who just abuse the system which irritates me.

So halloween was quite fun, did a party bus with some friends, friend got wasted and she puked on me and we didn't get to stay in SF the next day like we had planned because she was too sick. Oh well. See girls can't handle and that's one thing that I do not like lol. The holidays are upon us and I agree with Secrets of an All American about Thanksgiving. It has always been my favorite holiday mainly because I'm big on family and friends. I love seeing everyone get together, enjoying some good food and drinks and then sitting around just telling stories or playing games. Its always a good time and I always sit there and think life is perfect at that moment, now if only I had a guy to bring home as well.

Wait did I just say guy? Yup, well I was thinking about what I want right now and its a guy because first of all I never been with a guy so I need to see how it is to have a bf and second of all, if I got a gf right now, I just don't know how I would handle it all. I DO NOT want to cheat on her because I'm interested in guys and right now, I'm in a guy phase. Don't get me wrong, there's this really cute girl I started working with at some other store I float to and then there's that one girl I met through a coworker who has been a good friend lately but she hella hit up my phone one night...also she tries to get me drunk...hmmm AND she has a bf...uh oh not this again, STORY OF MY LIFE. Always messing with someone taken. Then there's the New Zealander guy...so I found out he's a football player for the local JC, I knew he was because he always comes by in gym clothes. Can't believe I'm messing around with a football jock lol. He's kind of a fuck bud, I text him when I'm horny and sometimes he comes by. For being such a jock, he really likes to make out which I'm not against because thats probably my most favorite thing to do. What about you? What is your favorite thing to do with a guy or girl, it don't matter.

Anyways this post has turned out to be longer than I planned. I just finished making some food for a potluck at work today, it should help with my little cold as well. So that cute girl I started working with was like, "damn, that's sexy" when I told her I can cook all types of food. Is it really sexy? Oh one more thing, cute or hot? What wins in your opinion, I say cute because hot gets old and less hot later in time lol. Alright I need to rest up and get ready for work, peace out!

random thoughts

First of shout out to Secrets of an All American, GREAT BLOG! Also to For My Sake because of his stream of consciousness post, that was pretty legit. So lets see, whats new? Can't wait for halloween, it should be fun. Party bus and the city, always a great combo. As far as work life, it's ok, took a temporary managerial position so that should be interesting. Everyone is pushing for me to take it permanently but I just cannot see myself staying in Stockton. Really though, is it realistic for me to move across the state for friends and particularly a guy? Seriously, I don't even know how into me this guy is, though he has become an awesome friend and yes I know he's into guys but how into, I am and he is, still figuring out. Ugh, so I dunno what to do, I'ma just see how this temp thing works out I guess right? Any advice from my fellow bloggers and readers will be much appreciated =)

What else? Nothing much really, attended exotic erotic ball in SF this past weekend, that was ok. Expected more, but it was crazy nonetheless. Not else much new with me, I want to find a volleyball league to join you know for some fun since I miss playing it and all. Plus it'll allow me to take out some frustrations. Try and guess my position, you'd be surprised I'm sure.